Cubs boozy lineup gets a major power boost with beer bats and CBD drink: Dollars and sense

Dollars and sense is a column about Chicago sports business and media CHICAGO The Cubs are running out of bats. No, not those kind. Im talking about the plastic ones that hold beer or frozen margaritas. The ones that cost $30.

Dollars and sense is a column about Chicago sports business and media

CHICAGO — The Cubs are running out of bats.

No, not those kind. I’m talking about the plastic ones that hold beer or frozen margaritas. The ones that cost $30.

Some would say Dansby Swanson’s bat is the biggest addition to the Cubs lineup — he had 12 hits in the Cubs’ first seven games — but if you go to a Cubs game, you know their new concession item, beer bats, are having a Sammy Sosa-like effect.

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When asked how many they’re selling per game, Cubs vice-president Colin Faulkner replied, “A ton. To the point we’re having trouble keeping our supply up.”

On Saturday, I did a couple of laps around Wrigley Field’s concourse and every few feet I ran into someone with a bat of beer. I asked one guy how much it cost, with tax, and he told me, sheepishly, it was $33.

“It’s kind of crazy,” he said.

Beer bats aren’t for the cost-conscious fans, but they’re an instant hit at Wrigley Field. (Jon Greenberg / The Athletic)

I ran into two people with bats full of frozen margaritas — giving off a Disney World/Las Vegas vibe — and they said it was cost them $30 to fill it up.

I talked to two young guys in line to recharge their empty bats and they said it cost $15 to refill with Old Style.

The latter anecdote was news to Faulkner, who didn’t think fans were allowed to get refills. He assumed fans were just getting beers and pouring them into their bats. That’s not the case. I saw servers refilling the bats directly from the tap.

Hey, it saves using another plastic cup, right?

So how outrageous are these prices?

Well, the Cubs’ large draft beers come in 24-oz cups, which is only slightly smaller than the 27-oz bats. A 24-oz draft beer is about $15 with tax, so fans are essentially paying $18 for a souvenir cup. The bat retails for $25 online, but the Cubs and Levy Restaurants are getting a wholesale price.

Business-wise, this is a smart move by the Cubs. The bats aren’t marketed at all inside the park, but they’ve gone viral online and in person, so they’re selling themselves.

Profit aside, giving drunk fans weapons/projectiles seems like a risky move. I’m awaiting the first beer bat fight and the inaugural bad call where the field is beset by flying plastic bats.

The Cubs have a lot of “official partners.” Basically anyone who is willing to pay them a lot of money can be the official whatever of the team. That mythical wheelbarrow of cash doesn’t fill up by itself.

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Case in point: On Friday, the team announced their “Official CBD Partner” in MYND, an (and I’m quoting the press release here) “award-winning wellness recovery beverage brand.”

This is only the beginning. Given that the Sunnyside marijuana dispensary is ensconced in the old John Barleycorn space on N. Clark St., how long will it be until the team is selling Cubs-shaped gummies? Or licensing official “one-hitters?” I’m guessing it happens whenever MLB OKs it (which I assume would be after marijuana is legalized on a federal level).

Given how eagerly MLB has embraced gambling, weed seems like the vice that’s on deck.

This CBD partnership, the first of its kind in the majors, is a big one. Mynd has its logos stenciled on the field near the plate along with a small sign in the outfield. Between innings, it has a major presence on the scoreboards and on TVs around the park.

Finding a drink inside the park took some work. In fact, I had to email with Cubs executive Alex Seyferth, who was quoted in the release, saying a Mynd drink “helps ease the stressors of everyday life, just like a Friday 1:20 game at Wrigley Field.”

He told me to try the stands in the main concourse, noting that they weren’t yet listed on the signage. I went to one of the speciality cocktail stands where, indeed, I saw them on the top shelf. When I asked for a flavor recommendation, the woman working the stand said she had never heard of this drink before Friday and believed she had only sold one, so far.

My Cubs column is about get a lot more chill. pic.twitter.com/gm8OBGNihR

— jon greenberg (@jon_greenberg) April 8, 2023

I made it two. The ingredients in the orange mango flavor can I purchased for $9.96 (including tax): carbonated water, orange juice concentrate, mango juice concentrate, lemon juice concentrate, orange extract, mango extract, hemp extract, stevia extract. It had 20 calories and five carbs.

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What did it taste like? Kind of like a White Claw without alcohol. That being said, I definitely felt something after drinking one. I wouldn’t say I felt relaxed, necessarily, but I definitely felt a little buzzed. More than I expected, to be honest.

I’m not really sure the value of these drinks, but Mynd, a Chicago-based company, is trying to use this partnership to make a splash.

Perhaps the funniest part of this deal is Mynd sponsoring a Pat Hughes-guided mediation video available on the team’s YouTube channel. For the lack of a better phrase, it’s a hoot.

I’m estimating that half of the eight-minute video is Hughes describing clothing, one of his broadcasting quirks that has endeared him to fans and paved the way to the Hall of Fame, where he will receive the Ford C. Frick award this summer.

“My sweater is of the multi-color vertical stripe variety, spanning several shades of red, blue green and even some browns and a little interwoven white thread design down the middle to give it a little pizzaz,” he says. “I’ve always been big on pizzaz. It probably should be my middle name. There’s nothing like slipping into a well-worn sweater for a ballgame like today. It just feels like saying hi to an old friend.”

Later, he’s describing a fictional hot dog vendor who “is dressed in a slick pair of denim shorts. Jorts, I believe the kids call them.” When describing David Ross he mentions the manager’s “smooth dome.”

“We don’t discuss the dome of David Ross all that often on Cubs radio and maybe we should,” Hughes says.

I’m thinking Pat missed his calling as a meditiation guru.

Sunday marked the end of an era in Chicago sports. The Bob Rosenberg era.

“Rosey,” the longtime scorer of Chicago, is officially retiring.

The 82-year-old Rosenberg has been an official scorer for the Bulls since the franchise was founded in 1966. Heck, he goes back to the Chicago Packers, where he was first hired by PR man Jack Burnett.

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But Sunday marks the season finale and his finale. He’s retiring. The Bulls threw him a little party.

I couldn’t make it for the soiree, but I did talk to Rosenberg at length back in 2009 as he approached his 2,000th baseball game scored, which he said was the major-league record.

While he didn’t start doing baseball until 1987 — when baseball writers stopped working as official scorers — that is how Rosenberg became pseudo-famous, both locally and nationally, for his trademark “wild pitch” call. He elongated the first word so it sounds like “why-ild pitch” and we all delighted in it. Sometimes you could even hear it on the TV and radio broadcasts.

Bob Rosenberg worked his last game as the Bulls’ official scorer on Sunday. (Darnell Mayberry / The Athletic)

Back in 2009, Rosenberg told me he kept score at every sporting he’s ever went to. It might be an exaggeration, but probably not.

Rosenberg was pushed out of his baseball scoring job after the 2019 season and subsequently decided to sell his six Bulls championship rings. According to Huggins & Scott Auctions, they were sold in a private deal in 2020.

Rosenberg could definitely be friendly with athletes. In his heyday, he was accused of over-estimating, to put it kindly, the rebounds, assists and steals for the Bulls and base hits for the White Sox. (He would also have to deal with angry, in-game phone calls from White Sox coaches and officials when his decisions didn’t go their way.)

Rosenberg swears he always played it straight, but …

“The All-Star game in 1988,” he told me for a 2009 ESPN story. “Charles Barkley, Dominique Wilkins, Michael, and a couple of other guys were there. I was getting this program autographed, the only time I get autographs are during All-Star games, and I ask Barkley to sign the program. He said, ‘I don’t sign it for bald men.’ So Michael goes up to him and says, ‘My man, do you know who this guy is? This is the guy who does rebounds and assists. So Charles says, ‘Oh, my man, I’ll sign it for you.’ Every time I’d see him after that, it was ‘Oh, my man, how are you?’”

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Rosenberg is most loved in pressboxes and media dining rooms, where his grouchy sense of humor endeared him to the rank-and-file employees and reporters. In 2018, a Sox employee won an individualized bobblehead of her choice in a raffle and she picked Rosenberg.

Can’t wait to take a video of my son unboxing a Bob Rosenberg bobblehead tomorrow morning. pic.twitter.com/OXTLBFxGiV

— jon greenberg (@jon_greenberg) April 21, 2018

The irascible, wise-cracking Rosenberg is a true Chicago character and I truly hope someone throws a wild pitch in his honor this week at Wrigley Field.

I’m not saying the listener demographic is old for sports radio broadcasts, but just like it is for Bulls games on 670 The Score, North Shore Adult Diapers is a major sponsor of Cubs radio broadcasts. Beyond the “heavy flow” of ad reads, the diaper company also sponsors opposing pitcher walks. … The cheapest beer at Wrigley Field is found in the Gallagher Way outdoor area and it’s $9.99 (plus tax). Vended in-seat beer is now $12 plus tax. … Small Cheval opened in the old Maddon’s Post spot outside of Wrigley. A single cheeseburger and fries will run you about $15 but it’s worth it. I had one for lunch Saturday. … Reminder, SeatGeek replaced StubHub as the official secondary market ticket seller of MLB. You can go there to find extremely cheap Cubs tickets for this week’s series against the Mariners. I suggest looking at Wednesday’s matinee. It’s expected to be sunny with a high in the low 70s.

(Top photo: Jamie Sabau / Getty Images)

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